Let’s take a closer look…
Every so often I have an epiphany, a brilliant insight or an itch that I scratch and scratch and scratch until I write about it. This latest compilation of the heretofore mentioned big three came as I read about something a columnist in England had to say about the upcoming presidential election in November.
Always known to be politically and religiously and scientifically incorrect, I decided to weigh in on a lot of the %$#@^%&^$$ shenanigans that we of the red, white and blue and the democratic way of life are miring ourselves down with. And I welcome all comments as long as you do as I do-include yourself in the insanity of what is going on from the great plain clapboards to the trailers of Florida-stupid and inane performances by all of us.
STOCK MARKET
Grrr. This category, Alex, makes me so mad I could spit when playing Jeopardy! Nothing makes me crazier than to play the game of buying into the American dream when one sector of the financial diversion game is to throw money into NASDAQ, S&P or the ole tried-and-true slut, the Dow Jones. Grrrr. Who with a 5th grade education would join a club run on fear and innuendo as does the Stock Market? Today as I write, the typical investor did not like something that happened with UPS, so down went the Dow escalator. Hysterical Hyenas and Nervous Nells are running the largest most heavily invested crap shoot in the history of Mankind, and we know that it is run on fear, gloom and doom and yet we beg to get in. My momma used to brag that she would put her money in the bank and earn 3% rather than speculate on whimsy. She died with modest means but she slept at night.
In New York Magazine today (June 24, 2008), there was a story about a trader who eloquently and powerfully is able to out the malfeasance of companies like Goldman Sachs and Lehman Brothers. “Anonymous sources” said that a naysayer like this trader negatively affects the market. You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
POLITICS
If I hear one more politician like Barack Obama or John McCain make a fool of himself and then apologize before the cancer can kill his candidacy I am going to storm the gates with the few to demand to hear what he means and stands by. Everything in the American political landscape is about floating trial balloons and if they are not shot down within five minutes by blowhard Lou Dobbs or know-it-all Focus on the Family founder Dodson or shame-on-you Sean Hannity, the balloon lives to fly another day. Is there a pure and simple statesman out there? If so, call me. Let’s do lunch.
In that same New York Magazine there was a article about Hillary Clinton extolling the virtues of this feminist losing candidate in the presidential race who elevated the status for other women who might come after her. The article was a shameful exposition of what I said above-politics as usual. When are we ever going to turn back the tide of skullduggery in the politics?
OIL
Who in the world is dumb, dumber and dumbest enough not to know that after we invaded several countries in the name of oil among other patriotic reasons that one day black gold would not be hundreds of dollars a barrel? Several people that I know in the tiny kingdom of Sedona have bought scooters, albeit powered ones. Many are riding bicycles. A few have dusted off their feet and are walking to work or to the store or to the synagogue to pray us out of this mess.
SAME-SEX MARRIAGE
I loved what Wanda Sykes, the funniest woman besides Bette Midler I ever heard, said about when a woman marries a woman or a man, a man. “What’s all the fuss? What’s got yo panties in a wad about two people of the same sex getting hitched when you don’t want to marry some girlfriend? Just because yo marriage is %%#&&^$$ up don’t mean those two lesbians ain’t gonna be happy. Chill. Try it; you might like it.” Okay, so I am paraphrasing a tad, but you get the picture. What’s the big deal? Do not write me hostile letters quoting scriptures about how homosexuality is a sin. I memorized every Bible verse written when I was a tortured Baptist, and I can promise you that the God of my understanding is not going to condemn two women for loving one another or two men either. “Love thy neighbor as thyself…just love not hate, and quit tending to other people’s business.” Okay. So I paraphrased again, but you get the drift. Butt out and write me about your holier than thou straight partnership. Not!
BLAME
I am to blame for what a crummy game the stock market is because I keep playing it and bitch when my portfolio shrinks. Politicians say stupid things and then tuck tail and meow, “I’m sorry,” because I let them get by with it. In the Sedona Intensive, clients have to change their behavior and are given life-changing demerits when they say such self-serving, meaningless and empty sissy talk like, “I apologize.” I indict me with “shame on me” for buying expensive oil when I should have stormed Washington when George Bush invaded Iraq-invasion of someone else’s country caused the price of oil to continue to climb. Then I should have stopped buying gas.
O, you in the great sea of unwashed and mewling and puking crybabies-straighten up and fly right. Walk. Invest in yourself. Run for office and out yourself before the pundits do.
